Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Success is a Process

Yes! I am very thankful to be living a life that I am proud of. I am not perfect. I have so many questions, but last night I was led to a revelation about even that. Rainer Maria Rilke said, "Try to love the questions themselves, Don't search for the answers, which could not be given to you now because you would not be able to live them." I am doing my best to live that. It's hard, because I am a fixer by nature. I always want answers and solutions, and I want them yesterday. But success is a process, not a product and life is a journey, not a destination.

I am doing okay-to-good in school. I need to work harder at Math and Health (I slack because they are my gen. ed.s), and then just step everything up another notch. I need to use my free time more effectively (like I'm doing right now, lol).

I am writing and reading and performing a bit more now, which is awesome. That is my balance factor. I go to school, I work, I volunteer, I try to eat right; and for me, I read, write, practice yoga and acquire beautiful things (often books, but sometimes clothes and accessories).

My spirit is getting stronger - probably because I am becoming more sensitive to it. Yoga does that. I am in pursuit of Right Mindfulness and Right Concentration. I am in pursuit of the balance between belief (in Christian principles) and understanding (of the innerworkings of the Universe). I went to Switch last week and this. I am starting to remember the burden for those kids.

My non-relationship is very much in the "non" part right now. I guess he's busy with work and stuff and I'm definitely busy with school. I'm learning to allow missing him to be only an emotion, not an action and therefore a distraction. And he's trying to make sure I do that. "Absence makes the heart grow fonder." I gotta get through school. They say true love waits. And I believe that fake love eventually dissipates. So, que serĂ¡ serĂ¡.

“Teacher, which is the most important commandment in the law of Moses?” Jesus replied, “‘You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ The entire law and all the demands of the prophets are based on these two commandments.” Matthew 22:36-40

I honor the Divinity that resides within me.
Praise God from whom all blessings flow.

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